Arguments are to be expected
A relationship is about two people from separate lives
coming together to find a way to build a life together.
It comes with ups and downs, and things are not
always going to go smoothly.
Knowing the kinds of problems to expect in a
relationship and how to deal with them will make you
feel very confident and prepared. It will also make it
less likely for you to give up since you already expect
The major challenges faced by couples and how to solve
them are listed below.
Insecurity: When you choose somebody to share your
life with, it can be very unnerving when it seems that
person wants someone else. This is where jealousy sets
in. A little jealousy is normal, but when you become so
obsessed and insecure, you might end up ruining a good
What to do? You need to find the root cause of your
insecurity. Has your partner given you any reason to be
jealous? If this is the case, then it’s time to talk to
them. If you distrust them because of something they
have done in the past, let them know you are not over
it. If this is an insecurity you have all on your own,
perhaps because you have been hurt by someone else,
then it’s time to find a solution to that. Talk to
someone to clear out old issues.
Feeling unappreciated : When two people come
together, there will always be one person that feels
he/she is doing more for the relationship than their
partner. A 50:50 contribution sounds ideal, but this is
almost always impossible to achieve. Someone will
always be doing at least a little bit more. This might
cause them to feel unappreciated or taken for granted.
What to do: Realize that the both of you are doing
your very best and contributing all you can. If you feel
unappreciated, then bring it up to your partner, but
you should also acknowledge that your partner is doing
the best he/she can. Showing your own appreciation
often can also encourage them to show theirs too.
Money Problems: Another common reason for couples
argument and fights is money. No matter how much we
believe money should not be a main issue in every
relationship, it often is, especially when the couple is
What to do: Remember that you are both in the
relationship together. If money is tight, then it is
time for you both to brainstorm on how to make things
better. If it seems one person is lousy with money and
is not good at managing, then it is time to make sure
the right person handles the money. It is very
important for couples to communicate with problems
Cheating : The number one cause of a broken
relationship is infidelity. This will instantly cause a
relationship to fail, or at the very least, cause the
trust between the couples to be destroyed.
What to do: If you have been cheated on, it is time to
be honest with yourself. If you believe you can never
get over it, it is best to walk away or you will end up
destroying both yourself and your partner due to your
pain. If you feel you can forgive, then make sure you
have a discussion with your partner and get to the root
of why the cheating happened. Better still, enlist the
help of a counselor and work hard with your partner to
rebuild that trust.
Lack of Communication: No relationship will survive
without communication. You have to tell your partner
what you are feeling and you have to listen to them
when they tell you what they are feeling.
What to do: If communication is lacking, then one of
you has to bring it up. You might think things are fine
until you wake up one day and realize your partner is
now a stranger to you. Communicating ensures that you
are both always on the same page. You understand each
other’s dreams and challenges. This is the only way you
can grow together.