If you missed episode 1 click HERE
I was awoken with a kiss on my lips by Iyoaye
and I saw her dangling the envelope.
Iyoaye: ife mi, where did you see $12,500?
I sprung up and checked the envelope. Truly it
was $12,500 in there and honestly, I was
scared; but I quickly came up with an idea.
Me: ah!!!! The Head Pastor told me to keep it
for him. He gave me late last night as I was
leaving the office.
Iyoaye: why can’t you keep it in the safe in the
church? Iwo okunrin yii maa pami (you this
man, don’t put me into trouble).
Me: (hugging her) don’t worry dear. Nothing
As I hugged her I perceived the odour of s*x
coming from her cloth. I asked her
Me: how was the programme?
Iyoaye: it was fine.
Me: really fine
Iyoaye: yes. Oko mi I am very tired. I want to
As she was going inside the room, I pulled her
Me: ife, can you do me a favour?
Iyoaye: what is it?
Me: don’t tell anyone that you saw this money.
Iyoaye: ok dear. But is it why u called me back?
Instead of answering her I squeezed her
Weapon of Mass Defence. But as I touched it, I
felt some sticky on it. I pretended not to have
felt anything. I allowed her in to sleep and I
smelled my hands. After some minutes, I
sneaked into the room and inserted my finger
into her holiest. When I withdrew my hands
from it guess what I saw………
After some hours she woke up and came into
the sitting room.
Iyoaye: my husband, why did you leave me
alone in the room
Me fuming) where the h3ll did you went to?
Iyoaye: what is the meaning of this question I
told you I went for the programme I discussed
I showed her the used CD I saw in her bag and
as soon as she saw it, she burst into the tears
and kneeling down in front of me
Iyoaye: please forgive me…….. the man has
been pressuring me to sleep with me. Even he
gave me an ultimatum that if I don’t sleep with
him he will terminate the business deals I had
(flashback) Chief Ladapo is a business man that
walked into our shop one day to clear all the
goods in our shop. Afterwards, he became our
financier, but little did I know that I was paying
back with my wife……..
Me: leave me alone for now. Just leave me
I took my phones and left the house. I tried
calling Dcns Emeka but her number wasn’t
reachable. I called Jide so that we could hang
Jide: Accountant the Accountant how far?
Me: gbege don happen. You dey for that our
Jide: na wa o. my first lady dey around. Na
bleeping things sure pass
Me: make I Whatsapp you.
Jide: ok padi mi.
I chatted with him and told him what
happened. As soon as he got the message he
Jide: Collins, kini mo ri yii (what is this I saw
) how did it happen?
Me: I am as clueless as Uncle Jona
Jide: lets meet at our usual spot with immediate
Me: alrite boss
We met some minutes later
Jide: Collins….o ga o. how didn’t you know what
was going on?
Me: JIDE if I tell you that I know what is going
on, I will be lying to you.
I narrated the whole event to him and
afterwards we discussed and parted for the
night. As soon as we got home I saw my wife
already packed her bags about to leave.
Me: what is this? (pointing at the bags)
Iyoaye: (kneeling and crying) my husband,
please forgive me I am sorry
Me: do you think I will chase you out from the
house? Well for your information, you are not
going anywhere (her face lit up) BUT we will not
be sleeping together.
Iyoaye: (holding on to my trousers) thank you.
(she burst into fresh tears)
I was remorse because I too was at the guest
house bleeping Dcns. Emeka that night but I
played hard so that my wife would not know.
I returned home in the evening and met my
wife in a somber mood. As soon as she saw me,
she ran to meet me and knelt down in my front.
I took her up and hugged her. I told her that I
had a surprise for her. We freshened and went
to Ventura Cinema at Samonda. We enjoyed
each other watched some movies and went
home. As soon as we entered the house she
wanted to apologise but I stopped her with a
kiss, then I unbuttoned her shirt and unhooked
her bra. I grabbed her Weapons of Mass
Defence and squeezed it mercilessly. She was
moaning like someone in the theatre whom
they are arranging his fractured bones.
Afterwards she reciprocated by removing my
OPA – MOSE and was stroking it. But the funny
thing is that OPA – MOSE refused to stand at
attention. It was rising and falling like forex. She
knelt down in front of me and started sucking
it. But as she was doing it, I started imagining
how it was Chief Ladapo standing in front of my
wife and she is performing orals on him. I
wanted to remove my OPA – MOSE from her
mouth but another part of me was saying that
I’m not innocent too. We continued and
afterwards, I started manipulation her. She was
vibrating like Nokia 2310. I sucked her Weapon
of Mass Defence hungrily. Then I carried her to
where she stacked cartons of malt. I placed her
there, placed her legs on my shoulder and
inserted my OPA – MOSE into her. We bleeped
each other in that position and later we went to
the dining and did wheel barrow style. Then I
carried her to the chair we did the missionary
style and I released powerfully into her we were
exhausted and we rolled over to the floor and
Iyoaye: my love…….(using her fingers to rub
Me: Iyo t’on mu aye mi dun (literal translation:
the salt that makes my life sweet) o se mi gan
Iyoaye: (breathes deeply) I know my love I am
I was looking into her eyes…the feeling when
you really want to hold something that you
don’t want to lose
Iyoaye: my love,I was thinking that when I was
caught, it was all over. I couldn’t believe that
you could forgive me
Me: forgive you keÉ…(she want to burst into
tears)…..cry cry baby, I have forgiven you ooo
She poked me and we started playing again.
We hugged each other and slept off.
The following day, we woke up very late and we
got to church late. After the service I released
her to be going home early because I wanted to
compile the reports for the month. After
counting the money and recording, I went into
my office and was working. I was busy to the
extent that I did not know my phone rang.
When I saw the phone I met twenty – three
missed calls; 16 from my mother – in – law, 3
from iyoaye and 4 from Ritababe. I called my
mother – in – law
Me: Maami, e ka`san ma (Good afternoon ma)
MIL: Omo mi nibo l`e gbe phone yin si! I have
been trying your line but you have not been
Me: the phone was in silent and I have been
MIL: my daughter told me all what that
happened and she told me what you did. I am
very happy you were able to handle the
situation even more matured than older men. I
will be eternally grateful to God to have such a
wonderful SIL like you.
Me: I had no choice so as to kill any scandal
that will trail the escalation of the issue; and I
have promised myself that nobody will settle
any crisis I have with my wife.
MIL: my son, I an happy. But can I ask you for
MIL: I want your “sister“ to come and spend
some days with me in Ajaokuta
Me: mummy no wahala. When can she come
MIL: the driver is almost in Ibadan. They will
take off first thing tomorrow.
Me: Mum, she is all yours.
I was relieved because there will be free days
for me to rest and to plan my revenge on her.
Later I called iyoaye
Me: Mumsi has called me.
Iyoaye: yes she had called me first and I told
her to call you
Me: ok ma. But cook soup down o
Iyoaye: é ti e ma wale na…. well it is ready and
Me: thanks dear. But I will be late from office
Iyoaye: ba damuwa (no problem)
Me: love you…. (calls ends)
As soon as the call ends, I call Ritababe. As soon
as she picked the call
Ritababe: are you in the office
Me: yes I am.
Ritababe: wanna tell you that I am on my way
Me: ok but where are you
Ritababe: I am at the junction. Are you already
Me: nope. Im still in the office
Ritababe: we will see tomorrow